the ski and smooch plan
by Axletia Rosonetis
Summary: When the Champions have crushes on each other, it's no fun to mess around, so Malva decides to make a plan. It may or may not work. phaesporiashipping.
1. Chapter 1

_co-existence_

 _(Original notes: Don't you love how no one in the Leagues are on the same page? Because I do. also i am proud of flort. )_

 _Originally written February 15th, 2016 on tumblr for femslash february. This was a fun short series. c: I'll be glad to be uploading this._

* * *

It was week three of collaborating between the Sinnoh and Kalos leagues, and everyone silently wished that _this_ was the week that things would work out and they could stop going through filibusters. It wasn't like any of their ideas were _bad_ – they weren't, other than a horrible suggestion revolving around an international giant robot crime-fighting team – but no one could just agree on the _right_ version of the idea. These idea-blockings were simply just absurd.

It didn't help that Sinnoh's Champion was deep in the canyons of lovesickness, either.

Last week she was adamant of fighting Malva, tooth and nail, over every proposal she had single-handedly blocked, but now she just quietly sat at her seat during the meetings and workshops, trying to doodle a coherent picture of Diantha. So far she'd failed, but she was determined to make the perfect portrait soon. Something was definitely up, though. She was like that, and Diantha even seemed to be quieter than usual, looking as coy as a Kirlia.

It annoyed Malva. Now that her main target was distracted by something other than work, there really was no point in blocking these proposals. All of Cynthia's co-workers were, for the most part, cooperative and seemingly business-oriented. She didn't really want to fuck with Diantha's happiness either, given that that angel was still one of the only people she could actually call a _friend_ , but seeing that blond goof around and blatantly express her hots for Diantha pissed her off just a little bit.

Honestly, those two should hook up already just so she could have her plaything back.

While Bertha proposed the idea of their sharing of mega evolution research, Malva wrinkled her nose and turned to Siebold. He wasn't always on-board for everything, but he'd have to do. She cupped a hand and leaned over his ear. "Hey, hey, do you think anyone else wants to get in on this fun?" she whispered.

Siebold squinted, then raised an eyebrow. "Anyone else? I didn't know you were adding me to this without asking me first."

"But you like fun."

"I do. Hmmm, quite possibly Ronald McDonald on the other side of us. What are we doing?"

"Fucking with the new couple."

"New couple?" Siebold's eyes widened, and he almost choked on the water he was sipping. "Wait, when did they?"

Malva rolled her eyes. "They didn't. That's the point. This collaboration is pointless if I don't have anything to play with."

"So you just want them to get together so that way you can fuck with the _schönes Mädchen?_ "

"She is _not_ that beautiful! Not even close to me _or_ Diantha!" Malva hissed. "Get your shit together, Siebold. Honestly. Now help me come up with a plan."

"Fine, fine. I'm never going to shake you off as a partner-in-crime, am I?"

The next day Cynthia squinted at the flyer that was handed to her. She would've been elated if anyone else besides Malva handed it to her. "A ski and service trip in a small town north of Dendemille?" she inquired. "Uh, wouldn't it be better if all of us focused on one trip instead of splitting up between us and the other group with their service trip in Coumarine?"

Malva shook her head, waving a hand. "No, no. We need to get exposure in much of the Kalos region as possible. I'm sure you'd do the same thing once our League visits yours in Sinnoh. And I would love to get to know you and Flort better."

"His name's Flint, but o…kay…"

She knew Malva was full of shit; that woman was definitely up to something, but she wasn't sure of what and why. For these past few days, she thought they were actually getting along pretty well, but then again Malva was still an enigma to her. She wished Drasna was coming with them instead. Or anyone else, really. But for now she nodded and let Malva continue. "Right, Flint. Ahaha, anyway, it should work out. I have a few connections around there, so it should be fun and good for the people. Oh, and if you didn't know, Diantha's been skiing for years and she still goes around on the Bunnelby slope with three or four layers of clothing. It's very amusing to see."

Cynthia's cheeks flushed. "What the hell's that supposed to mean?"

"Is it supposed to mean something? I'm just stating facts. But anyway, we should at least try to get along. For the greater good, I mean. Especially our lovely Champions, right?"

"….right…."

As she walked away, Cynthia caught the faint smirk on her face, and her blush deepened. Malva couldn't have known that she and Diantha had been on two late-night McDonald's dates since their attempted vandalism a few days ago…could she? Nah, not _even_ she was that perceptive…probably. They weren't close to being girlfriends yet, and it _would_ be nice to have a smaller ski and service group…but there was something fishy about it.

Or maybe not. She was really hoping that Diantha was right about Malva taking time to warm up to people.

As she walked down to the corridor towards her suite, she bumped into Diantha, who looked equally as confused. In her hands was the same flyer. "Oh! Cynthia, did you hear, dearest?" she asked, looking down at the ground. "We have a ski and service trip to attend to. Malva says we should have fun…"

"…right."

"Oh, please bear with me. I'm not a very good skier, though."

"Of course, hon. Ah!"

They both blushed, and Cynthia placed her hands over her face, letting out a muffled groan. While they had already been out on two cool dates, she was afraid that whatever relationship they had was too delicate for sabotage. She'd have to keep an eye out for Malva either way, and then there was Flint. Flint…

 _oh, no._


	2. Chapter 2

_car ride_

The car ride to the town north of Dendemille was a little long and a little too boring. The town was so small that no one even bothered to remember the name, but it was far away enough to think. Since Siebold was a cautious driver and drove _just_ under the speed limit, the ride from Lumiose to the town was roughly about two hours. But this gave Cynthia enough time to think, so even though the scenery was just a lot of trees and a lot of snow, she was grateful to have enough time to think of something.

That something was what to do on this ski and service trip. She sat in the back-middle of the car. On one side of her was Diantha, so quiet and peaceful and quite possibly taking a little snooze with her head resting on her arm. On her other side was Flint, who was constantly kicking Siebold's seat as he flailed around playing a video game on his PSP. It was like having an angel and devil on both sides. Well, it was pretty unfair to call Flint a _devil_ , but he was certainly mischievous enough to warrant some kind of demon status. Back during their college days when she was a senior and he was a freshman, he almost got her expelled from Canalave University at least twice. With her, him, and Volkner, they got into so much mischief (and booze) that Canalave University almost lost its own accreditation one time. If it wasn't for Cyrus, they probably would've been banned from every university in West Sinnoh.

Well, this time she didn't have someone to keep her in line, and while she and Flint always had fun times together, she didn't want things to get too wild as to prevent a relationship with Diantha…forever. And sometimes she and Flint got pretty wild. And by sometimes she meant often. So, if Malva knew Flint any better, she'd think this was definitely some sort of scheme. But she actually wasn't sure if Malva had even spoken to Flint at all in these past three weeks, so it was probably coincidental that Flint was in their group.

…Flort. She still wasn't sure whether her unease towards Malva could be called hate, but Flint being called Flort was pretty fucking funny.

She smirked to herself. On her left Diantha yawned and looked at her, raising an eyebrow. "Hmmm? Did I miss something?" she asked groggily.

"Just thinking about something. You think I can hold your hand?"

"Mmm, sure."

Cynthia grabbed her hand, keeping her giddiness to a low-key. Diantha's hand felt so soft and smooth and small. "Anyway, if I'm not disturbing your sleep, I could talk to you a little about my crew?"

"Hmmm, sure."

"You're interrupting _my_ beauty rest."

"Malva, I see you reading that fashion magazine. I'm glad you're interested enough to hear my long tales, though." Cynthia nodded to herself and squeezed Diantha's hand. Somehow this car ride was going to get interesting. "Right next to me is Flint, now also affectionately called Flort."

"Wait, I'm Flort now?"

"Yeah, Flort, you're definitely Flort." In front Malva stifled a snicker, and Cynthia grinned. This Flort thing was really funny. "Anyway, me and Flort met in college. He and his boyfriend both studied engineering. He also challenged his boyfriend's dad to a fight on two separate occasions and got his ass wasted both times. The second time we actually videotaped it 'cause they were both super-trashed."

"Yeah, so were you guys, so all of the best parts are shaky!" Flint cried, groaning. "I can't believe you got away with giving out rips with that low quality!"

"You see, Flort's very proud of that second ass-kicking."

"Oh, my."

"Our youngest member is Aaron. He used to be a gym leader, but then he became one of us…around three years ago? Right now he also does college part-time. I think he's training to be a nurse, not sure with humans or pokemon, though. He really likes helping people. Our oldest member is Bertha, and she's a lot nicer than she looks. She and Agatha of Kanto's Elite Four are sisters, but they don't really get along. Probably because they're so much alike. And Lucy's our nerd member. Sometimes he spends days holed up in his room doing research, and-"

"Hey, Cindy."

"What, Flort?"

"Telling your cute new gf about us is fun and all, but all of us in the car need the best deets. How did you and Diantha meet? How many dates? Does she like 100 pokedollar beer like the best of us?"

Cynthia flushed. "All of us in the car do _not_ need the best deets. And we're not even dating yet."

Everyone besides her and Diantha snorted. " _Yet_ , she says," they said in unison.

Now Diantha's face was also on fire, and she let go of Cynthia's grip to cover it with both of her hands. There was only one way to combat this. Snatching Flint's PSP out of his hands, she chucked it over to Malva's lap, grunting. "That's it. I declare this car to be a no-fun zone for the rest of the ride!"

Flint let out a loud groaning noise. Malva slowly picked up the PSP, looking at it with such disgust that Cynthia thought she was going to toss it out the window right then and there. Diantha looked like she was going to die of embarrassment, and Siebold quietly kept on driving, not making eye contact in the mirror with any of them.

Building relationships on this ski and service trip was gonna be impossible.

* * *

 _(Original notes: nothing relevant.)_

 _Originally written February 16th, 2016 on tumblr for femslash february. Second part._


	3. Chapter 3

_skiing_

After the long and embarrassing car ride, the service part of the group's ski and service trip went well. There wasn't much to offer in the small town besides shoveling snow for those in need, but they did it and did it well. While they didn't speak to each other, Cynthia had calmed down well enough to enjoy Diantha's presence as they shoveled snow for this neighborhood that had a primarily elderly demographic. It was monotonous, soothing work, and the constant clacking of steel against snow made for a good beat as nearby kids ran around and played with the shoveled snow.

Once they were finished with shoveling, the group and some of the kids worked together to make a rad snow fort and go up against each other in an equally rad snowball fight. Since Malva was the only one who protested and demanded that she go inside to warm herself up, she was their appropriate first target. But who knew she was just as fierce with cold things as she was with hot? Although Diantha was on Cynthia's team, it was Cynthia who received most of her attacks. And they hurt. A lot. Damn Flint for taking the high road and climbing the trees when the assaults began.

But a few hot cocoas and a few minutes of walking northward later, they reached the ski slope. Malva was right. Diantha was all cozied up in her three layers of clothing, looking like an inflated marshmallow, but at least she was calm again at this point, too, as she waddled to Cynthia and put a hand on her shoulder. "Thanks for saving us earlier," she said in a breathless tone. It looked like just the thought of a higher altitude was already affecting her. "You're not hurt, are you? You're…you're ready for this?"

Cynthia nodded. "Yeah, no prob, I'm fine. Are you gonna be fine on the Bunnelby slope?"

"Oh! Yes…I'm not a very good skier, but I'll have fun. Ah! But Cynthia, will you be fine on the Dragonite slope? I heard from some of the locals that they sometimes call it a demon slope."

"It's fine, it's fine. Those slopes have nothing on me and danger."

"Well, let me just give you something for good luck. I'll be waiting down here for you."

Standing on her tiptoes, Diantha leaned and gave Cynthia a quick peck on her cheek. Suddenly everything felt like a flock of Fletchling fluttering in the wind. So much for being calm.

* * *

Throughout her years in college, Cynthia would always drag Cyrus and other various buddies to go skiing with her. The Sinnoh region was very mountainous, and she would be foolish if she didn't take every opportunity she got to fuck around and take nature into a chokehold. The weekend before exam week in their freshmen year, she and Cyrus hiked up to the highest point in the Snowpoint Mountains. Cyrus had warned her on at least five separate occasions that skiing from such a high point right before exams was probably a bad idea; being Cynthia, she did not listen. At the time they were dating, and all she wanted to do was impress him.

In the end she had broken her leg, and both Professor Rowan and her grandmother was ready to break her other leg for being so reckless, but her impression worked. Cyrus was so horrified that he didn't sleep for three days straight and almost failed one of his exams, but it was all for watching her so she didn't try being even more reckless.

…okay, now that she thought about it rationally, she really fucked things up that time. But it had to work this time. She was a lot better at skiing now.

At the top of the Dragonite slope, she grinned as she waved down at whoever saw her from the bottom. Definitely Diantha…and maybe Siebold. He was bound to be wandering around somewhere. With her was Flint, who was doing stretches as he tried to hide his growing panic, and Malva, who smirked as she watched her by the tree, arms crossed. Cynthia couldn't help but squint at her. "I thought you don't ski," she murmured.

"I don't. I just wanted to get a front-row seat to this. And to be that person who tells you 'I told you so', because skiing from this high up is a terrible idea."

"You're the one who gave us this idea in the first place!"

"Yes, and I also mentioned that Diantha always takes the Bunnelby slopes. But I guess if you're so confident in your abilities…"

"I am confident in my abilities! I'll show you guys how it's done like a pro! You doin' this with me or not, Flort?"

Flint shook his head. "Nah, I'm good. I'll cheer for you from up here. My knees are weak, bro."

"Thanks for the support, bro. I'm going down!"

Placing the goggles over her face, Cynthia nodded to herself and eased herself forward, starting down the long and fast trek. Even though the Bunnelby slope was a lot safer and a lot less deadlier, going down a demon slope like this brought her an exhilarating rush that barely anything besides pokemon training gave her. It was the closest to what she imagined Garchomp felt like, so bold and fearless and just a smidge hungry for treats that came in a box. Now wasn't the time for thinking about life or death or even cute girls. This was a time for becoming one with nature, and then kicking nature's ass.

Down and down she went, overwhelmed with pride and excitement. If everyone wasn't proud of her, they should've at least pretended to be. Soon she'd pass Diantha, and she knew she'd make a good impression, even though she wasn't the least bit focused on impressing right now. Once she made it to the bottom, she would think about the impressions she made…and what was that Gible doing in her path?

Gible weren't even supposed to be found this up north, but there it was, and there she went. With the slightest jerk, she was sent flying backwards as her ankle made an audible crunching sound. She was less than halfway to the bottom, but it was going to be a pretty sick ride, and not in the good way of sick. At least she was going to black-out sober this time…

* * *

When she finally came to, she saw the sky above her and felt a stretcher under her. Someone must've had the ambulance teams on speed dial or something. Everything felt dizzy and groggy and in her half-muffled mind, she was pretty sure she had a concussion, but damn did it felt great. With a little groan, she shifted into a sitting position and gave a thumbs-up to everyone behind her. "I did it…I am queen the!"

Malva shook her head. "The paramedics thought you were dead for a few seconds. I told you so."

Siebold sighed. "She did. She made sure to text me the minute she said it. I'll make sure to cook you some nice breakfasts for your recovery."

"Aaaaaahhhhh, bro. I shoulda fudd up witchu aaaaahhhhhh…"

"It was totally fucking gnarly, bro."

She felt someone squeeze her hand while three paramedics forced her back to lie down on the stretcher. She was pretty sure it was Diantha looking like a weeping marshmallow hovering over her, but then again she had no idea what day of the week it was anymore. Monthurs?…Wednesturday? But it was probably Diantha because Diantha was the cute, angelic-looking one. "Cynthia, sweetheart, I'm so sorry!" she cried, sniffling. "You were looking so cool, but I should've stopped you! Or I should've given you another good-luck kiss..or…or something!"

"…can't stop this fuckin' falcon, babe. I've got these SICK MOVES-"

With her not-broken foot, she kicked in the air. Another paramedic rushed to shove it back down to the stretcher, screeching, "You've gotta stay relaxed, ma'am! We keep telling you that we have to transport you to Lumiose Regional!"

"…and then I'm gonna show off these SICK MOVES TO THE DOCTOR-"

She stumbled out of the stretcher as she made another thumbs-up sign. Diantha, Malva, and Flint all rushed to get her back up, but she wasn't about to be unprepared without a fight. Wrapping her arms around Diantha, she slumped forward and cackled. "…sick moves, babe. Sick moves."

"Yes, dear." Diantha patted her back. "We can't go out on any…hrm…dates until you see the doctor. Let's get you back on the stretcher."

"But my sick moves-"

"Back into the stretcher with you, knave," Malva snarled, pushing them both headfirst into the stretcher.

CRASH! and Cynthia and the stretcher fell to the ground, the blond starting up in laughs again as swirlies replaced her eyes. On top of her was Diantha, flailing as her three layers of clothing prevented her from standing up on her own. Two of the paramedics rushed forward, groaning, and Malva sighed as she pulled out her phone and took a photo. "She's gonna want to see this mess when she comes fully to. I can't believe they're gonna make a good couple."

Siebold raised an eyebrow. "Wasn't that your plan?"

"It was, but now it looks like we have to babysit her. This sucks. Hey, Flort, be a dear and finish tidying up this mess, would you? And don't let her show any more sick moves. She's going to drain the League's insurance at this rate."

As the commotion continued, Flint placed his head against a tree and continued to cry. He also liked the idea of Cynthia being in a cute couple, but why Flort? Why was he Flort? Why couldn't Cynthia be Flort?…

* * *

 _(Original notes: nothing relevant.)_

 _Originally written February 17th, 2016 on tumblr for femslash february._


	4. Chapter 4

_epilogue 02_

Cynthia reached for her scratching pencil and stuck it into her cast, itching the scratchy spot. Like all other casts, this cast was very itchy, and it was her misfortune that not only was her ankle broken but her entire leg as well. Again. She was supposed to have been released from the hospital two days ago, but between paperwork and forgetfulness that didn't happen. At least there were enough TV channels and green bean casserole to take away most of her boredom.

But she was really, really, really bored.

She was blessed by a whole bunch of visitors throughout the week. Her own crew, minus a hysterical Flint, who had been kicked out by hospital officials by the second day due to his incessant bawling. The Kalos crew, even Malva, who begrudgingly tossed her a pack of hot chips and told her to enjoy them or suffer (she still wasn't sure which option was better). Sycamore and his scary, giant, fugitive boyfriend, who sent her four dozen cookies against Lysandre's adamant objections. And, of course, the one person whom she especially looked forward to every day…

…who hadn't visited her yet.

Placing a pillow over her face, she let out a muffled squeal. She liked the attention, but she didn't mean for things to go this far…again. Somewhere within the Distortion World, Cyrus was probably watching and cringing at her. It was a valid response. She lost at how many times she had cringed at herself over these past few days. Sure, she had been told that her total wipeout was pretty much the best wipeout the locals had seen in nearly fifteen years, but of course that accomplishment had been then tainted by the mention that she could've really died. Well, she could've really died on any day. Life was life.

Her pillow was still over her face when her special visit came in, basket in hand. "Cynthia, are you okay? I brought you some fruit and I also have a surprise for you."

"Yeah, fine. You can put it on the table next to all of those cookies. And take some of those cookies. Please. Before my stomach explodes."

"Oh, my. Everyone told Augustine not to go overboard."

There was some slight shuffling, and then the pillow went off of Cynthia's face. Leaning above was Diantha was a small smile, relieved. She pinched the blond's nose and gestured to the fruit, but Cynthia shook her head. Those cookies were going to be the true death of her. Diantha nodded and sat in the chair beside her bed, immediately grasping for her hand.

It was kinda weird how a near-death wipeout managed to be the perfect thing for the two of them to get closer, but there they were, holding hands like it was nothing. Deep in her brain, she had a bad thought that maybe the Kalos champ was only pitying her or blaming herself for what happened, but she refused to believe either notion. On the second night, they had had a long talk regarding what happened, and after two hours of nonstop crying on both sides, they agreed that it was no one's fault. Even the Gible who was in her way wasn't really at fault. It was just lost and confused.

So, was what they had now really them becoming closer?

She liked to believe yes. Squeezing Diantha's soft hand she looked up expectantly, gray eyes sparkling. It was time to get down to business. "You said you brought a surprise, too?" she asked.

"Ah! Oh, yes. It's something we talked about a couple of weeks ago~" Slightly blushing Diantha rubbed her free hand within the basket's contents. "I didn't order it for the League because I wanted only you to use it…I don't think that's too selfish. Ah! But I wanted you to be the first one to have it."

From the basket she pulled out a MechaniBach, a back-scratcher that was constantly being advertised by those terrible infomercials. Cynthia remembered her and Diantha watching this when they slept over at Sycamore's after a pranking scheme gone awry. She could feel tears welling up in her eyes as Diantha continued, "It's a variation of the MechaniBach, meant specifically for all of those itches you can't get on your own. It's…it's not too much, is it?"

"No. Thanks! I love you so much!"

She wrapped her arms around Diantha, and she could feel both of them getting hot at the same time. Crap, they still weren't at that level yet. Her whole body began to feel tense until she felt a faint squeeze. Diantha placed her head on her shoulder, her expression not visible, but it was probably a good one. Probably. "I-I-…same.…I'd like for us to work out," she mumbled. "We should try it and see it where it goes."

"Yeah…yeah! I'll get better a lot faster with your love!"

"Dear, I don't think that's how recovery works.

"Yes! Yes! I'll do it and then our love will become stronger!"

Kissing Diantha on the cheek, she let go and made fists in the air. Somehow she felt like she was on the right road. Everything was right except her leg, and everything would turn out okay. And as long as everything turned out okay, she'd be okay enough to go bigger and badder with skiing one day.

Probably.

* * *

 _(Original notes: n/a)_

 _Originally written February 18th, 2016 on tumblr for femslash february. Too short, eh._


End file.
